Tuesday, October 18, 2011

The Mysterious Dame and the Case of the Etsy Shopping Spree

The following was originally posted October 17 on the BesTeam blog and was written to feature some of the fabulous shops on Etsy - via a virtual shopping spree and an imaginary $1,500.  Support handmade!  And if you are an Etsy seller looking for a supportive, active, fun and friendly team, please come check BesTeam out.

He knew she was trouble the moment she blew through his door like a twister cruising down tornado alley, but there was something about her silver artisan bracelet and the silk, hand-sewn scarf around her neck – Etsy creations, no doubt about it – that told him this dame was all class.  She was a real tall drink of water and his eyes were dying of thirst.  By the time she’d gotten to his door, she’d been to every P.I. in town and they’d all come up snake eyes, zero, zilch.  The job sounded simple enough but word around the joint was it couldn’t be done; not by the best, not by anyone, and especially not by him.  But he had news for this two-bit town: the joke was on them.  When he heard what she
wanted he took the job.  It would be like taking candy from a baby.  She thrust a fistful of grubby Benjamins at him - $1,500 BesTeam smackers to be exact – and his fingers hit the keyboard faster than seniors lining up at the hot buffet during the early bird special.  He knew what he was looking for and he knew just where to find it.  He was after the unusual suspects, the hidden gems, the odd and the wonderful: the creative underbelly of the beast called Etsy.

It didn’t take long for his peepers to find the first item and he knew it was a perfect.  This one-of-a-kind, handcrafted gourd harp from MistyMountainGourds would make that hard heart of hers sing like a canary.  He didn’t know for sure, but he woulda bet she loved dragonflies.  It set him back only $139.00.

Handcrafted Gourd Harp with Tree of Life Design

Probably she lived in some real fancy digs, a penthouse maybe, so he added this wooden wall art from LoveALittleArt and handed over $875.00 for the pleasure.  He was sure she wouldn’t have found anything like it anywhere else.

Taupe Modern Wood Wall Art, 36x72
No doubt this doll was wild, a real feral feline.  He snapped up a bobcat skull from DesertRoseTaxidermy for $45.00.  He was betting it would make her purr like a pussycat.

Bobcat skull
Speaking of cats…It would take a real man to tame this tabby - but he’d need all the help he could get.  He forked over $85.00 on robot arms from giantcardboardrobots.  The poor sucker could thank him later.  He was just glad he wasn’t going to be the chump on the other end of her leash.

Cardboard robot arms
A bird like that wouldn’t be wild forever; someday she’d settle down with some rich swell and have a family.  She’d need something soft and pretty for the rugrats.  These rabbit and plush bear glove puppets from coldhamcuddlies were the real deal – and a steal at $23.50 and $19.50.  

Brown Plush Bear Glove Puppet
Brown Rabbit Plush Glove Puppet


He couldn’t help chuckling at his next purchase.  Last thing he could imagine her doing was getting her pretty hands dirty mixing up a box of Betty Crocker cake mix for the old ball and chain.  The set of lamps from BootsnGuss were made from vintage Pyrex bowls.  Probably as close as she’d come to cooking up the grub.  He was looking at $225.00 for three of them.

Vintage Pyrex Nesting Bowl Set, Pendant Lamps
He wasn’t the clueless lug she probably took him for – he knew every woman on the planet drools at the thought of a designer purse.  And something told him she’d be needing it, and soon.  Something told him once the job was done she’d be on the next train out of this flea-bitten, God-forsaken
town and she’d never come back.  Maybe she’d think of him every time she opened this vintage Gucci carry-on bag from AtticGoods for only $79.00.  Or maybe not.  Anyway, he’d sure never forget her gorgeous mug.

Gucci Canvas and Leather Carry-on Bag
When she came back the next day he was waiting for her.  She seemed pleased with what he'd found, but who could really tell behind the dark Jackie O sunglasses.  Without so much as a thank you, she gathered up the loot and asked for the 9 clams left over and stuffed them into her new bag.  Then she walked out of his life forever.  He realized then that he’d never gotten her name.

(Note:  This BesTeam shopping spree was a whole lot of fun.  It gave me the opportunity to really explore what is available on Etsy - and what is available is astounding!  Take some time for yourself to browse the huge variety of handcrafted and vintage goods. - Annie)

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